Making Schools Emotionally and Physically Safer for Students

January 28th, 2009 By: Diane Trim in Articles, School Safety

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We all want our classrooms and schools to be safe for students. But a safe location isn’t enough, according to a Girl Scouts of America (GSA) study about girls’ safety. “Trusted relationships, in which girls feel valued and supported, are what make girls feel emotionally safe,” researchers for “Feeling Safe: What Girls Say” wrote.

Safety is both emotional and physical. According to the 2003 study, girls don’t define safety in just a physical sense; they define safety as emotional safety, too. The study found that 72 percent of girls defined safety as not being physically hurt, but 46 percent also included safety as not having their feelings hurt, too. Researchers found that being teased or made fun of outranks all other safety concerns for middle school girls; whereas, high school girls are more concerned about a physical attack (35%) or being forced to do something sexual (34%).

Trust is important to teens. Dr. John Byrnes, founder of the Center for Aggression Management, has identified aggressive behaviors and categorized them along an aggression continuum. Surprisingly, starting rumors, arguing, and depersonalizing others is at the base of Byrnes’s continuum.

“These stages of aggression are about planting the seed of distrust,” Byrnes said in a recent Inside the School online seminar. “If I come to [someone] and I wish to plant the seed of distrust, what I simply do is I don’t talk to [her], I talk to her community, those people she likes and respects and who she wants to like and respect her back.”

Byrnes said the aggressor starts to plant these seeds of distrust by saying, “I just don’t know about her anymore, I don’t think I can trust her anymore.”

Trust among friends is powerful for teens. The Feeling Safe study found that teens rely on their friends to feel safe. Among 16- 17-year-olds, 15 percent reported that they feel most safe and secure around their friends, up from 7 percent among 13 – 15 –year-olds. However, teens take longer to trust peers (21%) and adults (40%) than middle school girls (11% take a long time to trust peers; 28% take a long time to trust adults). Almost one quarter (23%) of the teen girls reported that they had fewer than three adults to turn to when they are in trouble.

Teachers need to make connections. Teachers know that the personal connections they and the students make are valuable. These connections are even more important when a teacher recognizes low-level aggression like rumors and gossip. The teacher has the opportunity to recognize the aggression and manage it, Byrnes said.

He suggested that teachers address the aggressor. A teacher might say, “You know, it really upsets me when someone ridicules another student.”

What does this accomplish? Byrnes said that saying something that simple can cause an instant connection with the aggressor. “It is so easy to connect with people and develop this rapport,” Byrnes said. “And, out of the rapport comes trust. You can move someone away from their aggression because they believe it’s good for them to do so.”

Coping with aggression. The Feeling Safe study found that girls do not feel physically and emotionally safe earn lower scores, have trouble paying attention in class, and make poor decisions. These same girls are the ones who have fewer than three supportive adults in their life, are less likely to get along with peers, and take a long time to trust someone.

To cope with low-level aggression, girls are likely to talk to their mother or girlfriends and avoid the person or place that feels unsafe. Girls who feel unsafe are more likely to soothe their fears through music (56%), crying (59%), watching TV (34%), or eating more or less than usual (29%).

As teachers, we need to identify the aggressors who are making life difficult for the students who feel unsafe in class.

“You know, we often hear about let the sleeping dog lie,” Byrnes said. “Not in our time. Not in our society. Not today. We need to identify these people and engage them – your challenge is to let them know that you wish to help them. If they’re ever disgruntled, they can share that with you. You will make a friend for life, because they will need you to communicate themselves. But, also, you remove one more aggressor from your horizon.”

Tags: safety

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